The first time I met my friend Lindsay, she was telling an early morning vanful of starving people who were on their way to a conference that she'd eaten a hearty breakfast of eggs and bacon. "I got up early and cooked it myself. I love bacon," she crowed. "I'm my own wife." She made it sound so appealing that I decided to become my own wife too. What are my credentials for this position? I have been unmarried and married. I have spent numerous years of my life studying the institutionalization of marriage in the nineteenth century, yielding a dissertation entitled "Tying the Knot: Marital Fictions in Victorian England and Colonial India." I've read Fannie Farmer, Betty Crocker, Mrs. Beeton, Moosewood, and the Law of Manu. I cook, I clean, I mend, I manage, I make home.
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